Jesus would be the perfect candidate to sustain the SGT ROCKSTAR mantra: Play Hard, Party Harder. He’s got a sidekick named Moses that can part the sea to make master waves on demand. If we get hurt, we get fixed! The ladies literally worship him. He would be the One responsible for keeping the party going with all the unlimited booze and extracurricular party favors. Fresh fish every night! Best part, Jesus can take care of all the local poverty while Hes there. Evidence is all in the CONTOUR!